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We all hear those stories in the news. The heartbreaking stories
about innocent children, so severely traumatized, or abused, or neglected,
it makes you wonder “how will they ever survive?… grow up?….
live a normal life?” If you have ever wondered what becomes
of these children, meet Jonathan. Jonathan is a survivor. Jonathan
is just one of the fractured lives that are healing with the help of Vista
Hill’s Learning Assistance Center, a unique mental health program
for school-aged children.
Born to young, ill-prepared, drug-addicted parents who barely acknowledged
his existence, Jonathan knew only violence and deprivation in his early
years. As a toddler, he tried to feed himself because his parents
rarely woke before late afternoon. When his baby sister arrived,
the family violence escalated. Authorities placed both children
in protective custody and eventually stripped the couple of their parental
rights. A kind woman adopted Jonathan and his sister, but just as
their future finally appeared bright, tragedy struck once again. Their
adoptive mother succumbed to her own battle with childhood abuse issues,
and committed suicide. Jonathan was only 7 years old.
With that final blow, it’s no wonder Jonathan was severely damaged
emotionally. Although Jonathan was very bright, qualifying for GATE
(“gifted”) classes, his insecurities and lack of social skills
severely interfered with his learning, his classroom behavior, and his
ability to make friends. Jonathan was living with a deep-seated
feeling of emptiness; that there would never be enough, at least not for
him. Not enough food, not enough attention, not enough safety, or
friends. He truly believed he was “not enough”,
that he was stupid.
Jonathan’s life was so out of control in the beginning, that he
needed to try to control others and situations in order to feel safe. He
would regress and talk “baby talk”. He’d become “Class
Clown” to make people laugh. He tried to reach out to other
children; but often by saying and doing all the wrong things. As
a result, Jonathan became the target of teasing and bullying. The
provocation became so intense that his peers would often resort to hitting
him to make him stop.
There is no telling what would have happened to Jonathan but for a 69-year-old
sociology professor and Vista Hill’s Learning Assistance Center
(VHLAC). Before Jonathan’s adoptive mother died, she and the
children had been living with Ruth, a college professor who had developed
a close relationship with the children and felt like their grandmother. Ruth
was determined to care for the children, but her hands were so full, especially
with troubled Jonathan, she needed help.
At this point, Jonathan came to the attention of his teachers, who contacted
Vista Hill’s Learning Assistance Center (VHLAC). VHLAC stepped
in with a full range of mental health interventions, including individual
and family counseling, medication therapy, and in-home support.
The Center’s staff has continued to work with Jonathan for the
past four years, providing him with the needed counseling and support
at home and in school to turn his life around. Today, Jonathan is
a very different young man than the emotionally scarred 7-year-old who
first turned to VHLAC for help. After beginning the school year
with failing grades, he recently graduated from 6th grade with As and
Bs. Jonathan now feels the excitement of learning and
eagerly anticipates Middle School.
Jonathan has learned to get along with peers, follow instructions, and
stand up for himself. He is no longer a distraction in the classroom;
he is now the teacher’s helper. Instead of creating trouble,
he creates art. At one point, Jonathan’s behavior had become
so dangerous, he was prohibited from playing with others on the playground. He
now plays happily with his friends during school recess. More and more
often, he enjoys activities with his sister, without the severe conflicts
of the past.
According to Jonathan’s grateful “forever mom” Ruth, VHLAC
has helped the family in many ways. “From the beginning, family therapy
sessions helped us to understand the impact of Jonathan’s many, many
losses. Medication has also helped Jonathan focus and manage his behavior. Therapy
has helped Jonathan understand his past experiences, and how they have affected
his attitudes and behavior. He is learning to receive and to give love. He
understands himself, and others, much better now. Jonathan has work
to do, but it is his and our hope that Middle School will be a wonderful
time in his life - - a challenge and also a reward for his hard work.”
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